How Elizabeth Gilbert made me rethink our obsession with purpose

And why seeking a purposeful life might be distracting us from what really matters

Purpose at work

I have spent a lot of my life thinking about purpose. I have run a recruitment agency in Sydney for ten years and have had my finger on the pulse of changing workplace trends and around how we view work. Over the past decade, I have seen how work has shifted from being just, well, work to something that is expected to provide meaning and purpose in our lives. The pandemic saw a huge shift in this too; people had been affected by this seismic, life altering experience and started to rethink how they spent their days. In Australia, at least, after the pandemic individuals would cite culture, meaning and impact as their key drivers for looking for new work or careers. It put pressure on organisations to clearly define their values, their mission and their culture in order to attract staff - appealing to the human side of the corporate coin.

But it also puts pressure on the individuals. I always thought that searching for purposeful work was essential for happiness - I have pivoted in my role, following the pull of what lit me up; mentoring and developing my team at times, creating community and bringing people together at other times, building our brand and challenging the status quo in what we were doing. I’ve done a lot of work that I am proud of in my ten years as a business owner and leader and I have been lucky to be able to shift and pivot in line with my curiosity. But I have always had a niggle in the back of my head that has questioned; is this the thing you can be working on right now that has the most meaning, the most purpose? It has been a constant, low level anxiety, a pressure that is amplified in a world that tells us that contentment exists only when we are sharing our unique skills and gifts with the world.

I honestly hadn’t put much thought into how that could be a potentially challenging way to view your life’s work until I stepped into the room with renowned author, speaker and general life guru,

Elizabeth Gilbert

. She was hosting a two day creativity and liberation workshop in Sydney and every minute I was in that room last weekend was spent nodding and smiling in agreement (and awe). She is one wise woman.

Find a man who takes photos of you coming out of an Elizabeth Gilbert workshop in case you want to use them on Substack…! <3

‘Purpose - anxiety’

Liz Gilbert (we’ll shorten her to Liz - we did spend the weekend together after all) started off the weekend by arguing that being told to find your purpose is a hugely anxiety inducing task. We are told that out of the 8 billion people on earth, we are to find that one thing that we can do that has impact, gives us purpose, adds value to the world and that we must try to monetise - no pressure! If you think about the weight of that lofty task, it is actually quite laughable.

Liz spoke about how this intense pressures sees us living lives riddled with ‘purpose anxiety’; fixated on the future and what our impact should be, at the cost of being present in this very moment. On reflection, I could absolutely see this; I had spent so many years doing meaningful work; starting and growing others’ careers, matching thousands of people with employment, consistently working with my team to raise industry standards by treating people well and with kindness. And yet, I still had in the back of my head - is this enough impact, does this provide enough meaning, is this most aligned with my purpose? A niggling voice that never fully shut off despite how much I accomplished or how much fulfilment I was getting from my work.

Naturally, there are issues with this. Being focused on our purpose is future focussed, it is anxiety provoking and it cements the idea that things could be perhaps slightly better in future, no matter how well they are going now. It takes away from the present moment and it keeps one eye on what’s ahead, at the cost of what is now.

What if?

Purpose anxiety manifests by questioning things such as; should be I earning more money, should I be in another career, should I be doing more creative work etc. The results of questions like these cannot be measured. There is no answer that will ever be enough - you can’t define exactly what it might mean once you have created this life of purpose or meaning or impact - what does good look like?

Another pitfall of finding your purpose, Liz Gilbert explained, is that it is totally focused on the individual. We are thinking about ourselves, our meaning, our journeys. It is not a community focused endeavour. Even if our purpose and meaning helps others, it is essentially a selfish task, wondering if our purpose needs are being met.

Present-driven

And so, what is the antidote?

According to Liz, we should be aiming for a life that is ‘present driven, rather than purpose driven’. When we focus on the present moment, what is here and now and live our lives through curiosity, we are experiencing life as it happens. I can see the appeal of removing the pressure of purpose-anxiety. In the workshop, she had us write a list of things we love doing (our enchantment list) and asked us - “What if this is your life’s purpose? Just the things on this list? Just that? Perhaps, if we all lived by this, we’d be a lot less medicated”.

If that is the case, my life’s purpose is to swim in the ocean, write down my thoughts, experience deep connections and go to bed every night at 8pm with my book. Doesn’t sound like a bad life, let’s be honest! It is most definitely aligned with the sparkly-ness that I’m trying to achieve.

I’d love to know, how do you view purpose? Do you strive for a life of meaning? Can you resonate with the feeling of purpose-anxiety? Let me know your thoughts below!

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