Five books on my bookshelf that I will not let you borrow

The ones that moved me and stayed with me. And other books, podcasts and shows that I loved this week

I felt compelled to nest today, and that nesting took the form of reorganising. In particular, reorganising the book shelf that towers near the front of our home. A custom book shelf that I had made when I first bought my home seven years ago, it is a little space that brings us much joy. Functionally, in a small inner city terrace, it makes no sense to have a large bookshelf instead of a desk or home office, but it’s a choice I do not regret (especially now that it’s all organised, colour coded and pretty).

I think the books we decide to hang on to is a very personal thing. For me, I do a regular inventory on what books I have; reassessing which ones to keep and which ones are ready for a new home. The criteria for the ‘keep pile’ tends to be: books which remind me of a time or place or version of myself that I have some associated nostalgia to, books that I want to share with friends or family in future, books that I know I’ll want to revisit down the line, in different stages of life and books that simply just stirred something in me and stayed with me. Oh, and books that my partner chooses to keep, for which he has been allocated a small portion of said bookshelf. (A very similar situation to our wardrobe - sorry, Ant).

Their new, updated, colour coordinated home

And so, with the above in mind, this is a post about the books that have stirred something in me - the books that cracked me open and stayed with me. The ones that, every time I see their cover or spine, I am brought straight back to when I first read them and how they made me feel. As I perused every book in our collection today, with a view to reducing the numbers down, I came across a handful that I just knew I would never part with. How rude, I thought, to keep those books to myself - and so, here I share them with you.

If you have read any of them, did you adore them too? If you haven’t, I am entirely jealous and wish there was a different version of me who had never read any of them so I could read them again with new eyes. The list is in no particular order because if you asked me to rank them, it would be like if you asked a parent to rank their favourite child and I just couldn’t, so I won’t.

A millennial classic

Number one: Everything I know about love by Dolly Alderton

Like every millennial woman in the Western world, this book was seminal; the representation of the power, beauty and significance of female friendships in our lives. This book is a love letter to some of the most important relationships of our lives. It may not land across different generations but for those of us who it was written for, it is a book with deep resonance. A Dolly fan forever, over here.

Five photos where I realise I desperately need those nails redone

Number two: The book you want everyone you love* to read - *and maybe a few you don’t by Philippa Perry

Philippa Perry is a British psychotherapist known for her weekly column in the Guardian. She has written a number of bestselling books, with this one being her most recent one. A deep fascination with psychology, the mind and how our brains work, this book was not my first pop-psych rodeo, but it stayed with me. I must have read it at a time when I needed its guidance and I found her approach to managing interpersonal relationships, dealing with conflict and reflecting on your own patterns and behaviours to be extremely well written; relatable, witty and actionable, it is far more than a self help book and her work is well worth exploring.

This book broke my heart, it’s such a gorgeous and relatable read

Number three: First we make the beast beautiful by Sarah Wilson

Okay, so I said I wouldn’t pick a favourite child, but I actually take that back. This is my favourite child. Everything about this book - how raw, vulnerable, intelligent and relatable it is and how heartbreaking parts of Sarah’s story are. In Australia, Sarah Wilson was known as the ‘I Quit Sugar’ gal. An ex-magazine editor, she pioneered and wrote about the war against sugar, long before ‘zero sugar’ became a concept. She has released cook books incorporating both local, seasonal food and minimal waste ideas but this was her first foray into memoir style writing. She opens up and shares about her own anxiety and it really makes for a stunning read. Having read it at a time of high anxiety in my own life, I clung to this book and cried throughout. It may land very differently now that I am in a very different place, but I would recommend it as essential reading to everyone. Sarah is now working on climate and political activism and has since written other books - I would direct anyone with an interest in the most important issues to her Substack.

“The fix is not to get rid of the anxiety. The fix is to hold ourselves and each other steady as we walk through it.” Sarah Wilson

A life affirming, perspective shifting read

Number four: The choice by Edith Eger

This is a beautiful book - I think my mum recommended it to me originally. Written by Eger when she was in her late 80s, this book is a memoir that spans her journey as a teenage Hungarian Jewish girl whose life was upended when the Nazis invaded Hungary. The book is packed with wisdom, quotes you will want to write down and return to, and life advice to live by. The story is reminiscent of Man’s Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl, which also would probably be included on this list if I still had a copy of it. A raw memoir about how, even in the most awful, dire, cruel circumstances, we still have our ability to choose resilience, bravery and strength.

“Time doesn't heal. It’s what you do with the time. Healing is possible when we choose to take responsibility, when we choose to take risks, and finally, when we choose to release the wound, to let go of the past or the grief.” Edith Egar

Read it - it’s wonderful.

Number five: Phosphorescence by Julia Baird

(This might be my second favourite child). Another Australian author, this book is set in Sydney but its themes of seeking meaning in life and overcoming hardships will resonate with anyone around the world. This book is honestly just gorgeous. Navigating a life threatening cancer diagnosis with a young family as a single mother, Julia Baird talks about the importance, and the absolute necessity of finding awe and wonder in the world. An avid ocean swimmer, she writes so beautifully and it is a stark reminder that, no matter what we are going through, appreciation of the little things around us can pull us out of our darkest times.

“Life is not always luminous. But if we wait and watch and learn how to see, we can find moments of phosphorescence — the light within.” Julia Baird

By no means is this a concise list of my favourite books ever (although some might feature), but it is a list of the books in my home currently that you would need to pry out of my hands - unless you haven’t read them, in which case I would be pushing them into your arms for you to take home and enjoy (and perhaps immediately going out to replenish the lost stock). What books would fall into this category for you?

Sparkly Recommendations ✨

The second edition of my sparkly recommendations - I’ll always have more than I can fit in this section but here are this week’s favourites:

📖 What I Read: I’ll have what she’s having by Chelsea Handler - I know nothing about Chelsea Handler other than being vaguely aware of her celebrity as an outspoken comedian. But then I heard this book recommended by one of my favourite Irish comedian/ podcasters Joanne McNally, and I dove in and I loved it. Chelsea is a pro-women, pro-sisterhood feminist who is wise, funny and kind. It’s such a gorgeous light read, even if you have basically no background context.

🎬 What I Watched: Toxic town and Adolescence, both on Netflix. I couldn’t pick one. Both of these UK dramas were excellent. I think Toxic Town was slightly eclipsed in the media by Adolescence, which has been gaining new headlines every day for its subject matter and for how it was filmed. They’re both British dramas dealing with very heavy themes but each stands on its own with the acting, the production and their storylines. Highly recommend both!

🎧 What I Listened To: The rest is politics: US. Political podcasts are absolutely thriving in the absolute, flood the zone chaos that is America at the moment. There is news every day to report on and an abundance of podcasts/ media outlets to follow for updates but what I love so much about this one is the insider element and the global lens. Both hosts are in the White House inner circles leading to more interesting perspectives and with one host hailing from the UK, they often look at a European perspective on all of the madness that is unfolding. It’s as informative as it is engaging.

🍽️ What I Ate: THESE Thai pork mince balls in a green curry. A friend shared the recipe with me and it did not disappoint. Straight forward ingredients, easy to make and next level flavours. They were DELISH.

This was as good as it looked. We sat, eating them in silence, looking at each other in awe and delight and with very full mouths.

*****

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